thoughtofyou
Dinah Lance blondecanary
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Room 312, Saturday night
Post-luau, Dinah was playing with Camille in her room, music on and thinking of everything that had happened over the last two weeks, including vampires, demons, boys-who-were-girls, and presents and the party and everyone else there.

Loooots to think about.

[for one blonde witch]

Karla sat on the bed, leaning into Dinah a bit, even as she rubbed Camille's belly. "I need to talk to Lady Ghanima," she agreed. "She's teaching me to be a Bene Gesserit. But, yeah, I wanted you to have something that you can always fall back on, even if you never need it."

"Yeah," Dinah said quietly, thinking back to two weeks ago. Camille purred and stretched happily, elongating like a Slinky. "I know it protects me from hearing anyone else's thoughts. Does it protect others from hearing mine too?"

Karla nodded. "Our shields protect the Self, whether it's from accidentally incoming or outgoing thoughts. Though you can adjust the level of the shield, so you can hear or send thoughts as needed. I'd hate for you to be trapped somewhere without being able to communicate."

"That would suck," Dinah admitted, thinking about Emma saying how loud she was, and how hard she tried to control her telepathy volume. But if that were the only way to call for help, she'd take it.

She touched the bracelet, glad to have the distance from what she wanted to tell Karla that explaining it mind-to-mind wouldn't allow her. "Some stuff happened, in the other Fandom. That's why I'm extra-glad to have this." She smiled a little sadly. "I'm a lot better with it than I was two weeks ago." And she owed Jack a thank-you for that, somewhere down the line. "But this helps me think about the future without being scared."

"What kind of stuff?" Karla asked, head tilted. "You mean beyond the stuff I already know about?" That was...kind of a horrible thought, considering the stuff she already knew. "Dinah...did someone hurt you?"


"Beyond that, but... no, nobody hurt me." She frowned. "Not exactly. It's complicated." Dinah held up her wrist, turning it back and forth. Camille batted at the shiny stones, until Dinah picked her up. "That's why I want this on when I explain it to you. I can't even figure out what I feel about it, I don't want you to have to deal with it too. I need to talk so it makes some sense."

"Do you remember bringing me your blood?"

"Oh course I do." Karla was glad for the bracelet. Otherwise, Dinah would pull away, worried about sharing too much, and Karla was sensing this was going to require a hug. "Would you like some wine?" she asked.

Karla didn't advocate hiding behind alcohol to deal with problems, but numbing one's emotions while talking about trauma wasn't always a bad thing.


"Maybe? Just a little?" Dinah cuddled Camille, and smiled a tiny bit. "Thanks. And... Is this okay? Or is whatever happened with Ender, and Ben, is this too much to dump on you now? You seem so much better after your trip home, but-- I don't want to hit you with stuff that makes you too upset again either."

Edited at 2009-08-16 03:45 am (UTC)

"Dinah," Karla explained patiently, "I will always have time and energy for you, even if I wasn't a Black Widow." She called in a bottle and two glasses, filled them halfway and handed one over. "I will always listen to you. No matter what. And will not judge."


[Sorry. Unexpected guests]

[np! RL always wins]

"I judge me. Well, I was. Not so much now." If Jack could suck it up, and have sex under weird circumstances and imposed attraction to save the world, and be an adult about it... she could cop to needing to save herself, and maybe having mixed reasons for it.

Dinah took the glass, and after a few sips, and getting her thoughts together, she said, "Actually, I guess it started the Thursday before. I dreamed about my other self." She smiled wryly. "After she didn't manage to finish off the other you and Triela, she went to this place that, um. Sold blood." She looked down at the glass in her hand, and shook her head. "No. Sold the chance to bite somebody."

The bracelet might shield Dinah's thoughts, but Karla could still catch a hint of her psychic scent. So many emotions roiled through it. "Oh, Dinah..." she murmured as Dinah collected her thoughts.

At Dinah's description, Karla frowned, thinking. "Like a Red Moon House, but for blood?"

"Yeaaaah." Dinah was blushing now, and no psychic abilities would be needed to see how this embarrassed her. "Some people, well, even here. They like to be hurt, as, um. Part of sex. Or to hurt someone else." She cleared her throat, and steadily said, "There's nothing wrong with it, I know that, if both people are into it, and they're careful. The vampires at the 'flower shop'-- they wanted to feed off someone who'd they'd leave alive. And the people they fed off were getting paid." Deeper, darker red, and Dinah took a sip of the wine to cover, closing her eyes.

"It wasn't sex, but it was really close to it." She rubbed her face, unable to look at Karla. "Other-me went there on Thursday, and bit this guy that I met last May. Just before you came here, actually." She dropped her hand, looking down into the wine cup, seeing Sam's face. "He's an alumni here, he graduated a year ago. He has a boyfriend and a girlfriend and ... he was nice to me. When we talked at Fight Club." She blew out a breath, rushing to get through the explanation. "He was going there to be bitten so he'd have stuff for the fighters in the dorms. And, uh. Because he liked it."

Violence as part of sex didn't faze Karla. She just nodded a bit. "It's suppose to increase the pleasure, the same way it's fun to be scared sometimes. A bit of pain enhances pleasure, so they say." Black Widows had no problems being blunt with their sexual topics.

"Sharing blood is very intimate," she continued, thinking aloud. "Even just giving you some of mine in a container was. I'm giving you something that is literally part of me. I can't imagine what it must be like to actually take it from a person. The heat, the closeness, the adrenaline rush..." Karla trailed off, realizing that her Healer-instincts might not be helping Dinah right now.

"I'm sorry. Keep going."

Dinah flailed internally, compass spinning and not sure where to point at all that clinical detail. All that accurate clinical detail.

"Like that. Yes. Exactly." She turned the cup in her hands without taking another drink, the reached out to pet Camille. "So. That was, um. Thursday." Breathe, Dinah. Just keep breathing. "And dreaming it, it was ... hot." She rolled her eyes at herself. "Other Me, she liked to feel what he felt too, while she was drinking, so. There was the blood, and there was him, liking it a lot, and-- if it had gone on for a few more weeks, or even a week, they probably would have ended up in bed too. If she didn't kill him accidentally or on purpose."

Dinah stopped there a minute, and let her hair fall into her face again, remembering how much it had embarrassed her to have Karla watch her drink blood out of a cup. So weird, almost exhibitionistic to talk about this, but not. Not sexy, just... safe. Intimate, but not the other. Still unnerving, though.

Karla thought she could guess where this was going. "Was he there? Later?" she asked, as gently as she could. "When you'd crossed over?"

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